I met a friend for coffee. In our conversation, I mentioned that I’m now able to live on the dole (welfare payments). I casually mentioned how much that is. My friend said ‘oh, yeah, that’s not much’ and offered me toiletries she gets for free from a friend. Maybe she just made conversation but let’s assume that she felt pity because of my low income status. But I find happiness in this unlikely situation.
Being proud where usually people might feel shame
Interestingly, I have a very different viewpoint and am proud that I can live on the dole. Before anyone calls me a bludger or lazy – let me clarify that I mostly don’t live from social welfare payments and do my best to avoid doing so. I work but it’s currently 10-week contracts and I’m grateful for the safety net.
I’m not sure if anyone living from welfare payments is a bludger. It’s not something you want to achieve – usually. It’s very little money, making paying rent, food, and other basics possible. But it’s tight. Further, the system is very punitive. Besides trying to manage life on a tight budget, you must continuously prove to job agencies or the human services agency Centrelink that you are looking for a job or justify why you can’t. It’s a full-time job to live from welfare payments. I wonder if anyone would choose to do that if they saw any other option.
So, I left my two-bedroom apartment to live in a boarding house room where I share bathrooms and kitchen with about 30 people. This is much below the common standards around me. But besides having significantly less household to manage, the comparatively low rent enables me to survive on welfare payments if I have to. With the two-bedroom apartment, the rent only was higher than welfare payments. But now, it would be covered.
After going through cancer and divorce, I had to spend a lot of time recovering my health (still working on some last bits there) but also rethink my approach to life. Trying to get as much done as possible and making everyone happy didn’t work out well for me. Ignoring all kinds of signs from my body, it had to produce cancer before I started to get the call for help.
So, I need a new approach to continue this life and I’ve been working on that for a while. Unfortunately, changing attitudes, beliefs, behaviours and habits isn’t done easily overnight. Also, there is no guideline on how to do this. I mean there is, but I have to find the ones applying to me and work out how to use them. It all takes a bit of time.
Find happiness where it’s unusual
So, instead of being frustrated with not having a luxury lifestyle with a house, horse and something else with h, I’m feeling happy. Yes, happy. Happiness has to do a lot with feeling agency over our lives (so feeling in control to some extent). Now that I can live on what society offers to those who cannot contribute (currently) to generate income, it enables me to sort out my life – having more of a say in what I do, overwriting what I feel is expected.
Being able to live on welfare payments takes away the pressure to find a new job after my contract is over. I feel more relaxed and see better opportunities because I don’t have the tunnel view of stress. Also, a marker of happiness. Further, I only have to manage a room and not an apartment regarding cleaning and tidying. This smaller space gives me more head space to gain clarity. Having clarity is also important for happiness.
You are hopefully not in a situation in which you have to consider moving into a shared house (unless you already live in one). For many people this is a horrible thought. But my point here is that it’s possible to find happiness in unlikely situations. I hope to afford an apartment or house again. But right now, I don’t want that. And whatever happens, I’m happy now. And the Now is what counts.
Are you happy?